Korea is Kool

Hey, kids.
Wait, has it been another week already? Strange. 

First of all, I hope Arica and Sophie had happy, happy birthdays! I was thinking about them this week! So, it's been another amazing week in 만수. I've been so blown away by how much the Lord's hand is in our day-to-day lives. Often times we don't even realize it until we sit down at the end of each day and are going over the events that occurred during the day. Missionary days are compilations of hundreds of little miracles. Earlier this week I was asking for eyes to see the miracles and let me tell you-- I've seen them. 

We've been going through all the old records of former investigators this week and have had such an incredible experience with that! We found a woman who has been going through a certain set of circumstances and has been searching for the kind of peace that the gospel can offer. She literally said, "I have never known God-- but I think I am ready to know Him now. I want to learn more about your church." And we were freaking out because... hello! Golden investigator! Buuut... alas, we discovered that she doesn't live in our area. And so we referred her to another set of sisters. Funny story: we've deemed ourselves as the "referral sisters" because we have found so many awesome investigators and have had to refer them to other sets of missionaries for a variety of different reasons. But don't worry, we're keeping our heads high and working harder than ever. Finding is a very difficult aspect of missionary work-- but we're smiling our way through it-- every step of the way.

We do, in fact, have a new investigator though. She is meeting with us because of English interest but the way that our first meeting went actually really made me excited for the meetings to come.  She said, "I don't believe in God because I cannot see Him." and shared that a lot of the reason why she has a "closed mind" towards religion now is because of the bad experiences she's had with religious people telling her that she'll be condemned to hell if she doesn't believe. Korea is loaded with people who are so pushy with religion. It's actually rather uncomfortable. And as a missionary, it's pretty difficult to get on people's good sides because as soon as we introduce ourselves as missionaries they assume we're going to start telling them to "repent or go to hell!!" Again-- religion in Korea is pretty intense. People want to bible bash ALL the time. Anyways, the only thing I could think to say at that point was this: "I guess in some ways, God is similar to the wind. Maybe you can't see it-- but you can feel it." We shared that we aren't trying to force anything upon her-- this gospel has blessed our lives so much and because of that, we've left our loved ones, our home, our schooling-- everything-- to share it with people who are looking for answers. She seemed pretty uncomfortable when we first started talking about the gospel with her, but by the end of the meeting she seemed to trust us a bit more. 

Fun fact: So-- my official soccer name is now 김승, or in other words, "beast." Bet you can't guess why... I'm pretty excited about it. Don't be surprised when I end up with a Korean soccer jersey and "beast" written in Korean on the back.

Another fun fact: my companion and I climbed the stairs all the way up to our apartment this week. In case you were wondering, we live on the fourteenth floor. Yikes. 

So when a Korean invites you over for a meal they will literally watch you eat and continue to refill you plate/bowl/cup until all the food has been consumed. Not even kidding. So every time we eat over at a member's house we feel like we're going to die. Funny story: this week we had four consecutive appointments with members in one day. Two of which were meals. We ate two ginormous meals in the time period of two hours. I've never felt so huge in my entire life... it was awful. The food was amazing. But it was awful. The worst part? My comp saying, "Get used to it." Hi, I'm going to gain four hundred pounds on my mission. 

Speaking of food-- I conducted a food experiment this past week. I called it the "Fake it until you make it" experiment. Hypothesis: If I tell everyone that all my least-favorite foods are my favorite, eventually I will learn to like them. Conclusion: If I tell everyone that my least favorite foods are my favorite, eventually I will learn to like them. I'd say it was a success, what about you?

Joke of the week: my face. Okay, Korean weather has made my skin wayy wayy irritated. Long story short, I've been dealing with some acne for the last week or so. That being said, I've had two members (in the last two days) approach me and ask me what's wrong with my face. Once even suggested a hospital visit. Wayyy too funny. Also-- Koreans are extremely dramatic when it comes to medical things. Just saying. 

Well, I'm running out of time but I just wanted to say that I am so happy and that I'm so grateful to be in Korea! I read the entire book of Matthew this week and was soaking up all the wonderful teachings of the Savior. So incredible! One story that really struck me that I wanted to share was the story of Peter walking on the water. In Matthew 14:29-31 it talks about how the Savior invited Him to come unto Him and how initially, Peter had enough faith to walk upon the water because he was focused on the Savior. Eventually, however, he began to focus too much on the crazy circumstances that were around him and because of that, he began to be very afraid. When he lost focus on the Savior, he began to sink. At that point he calls out in desperation to the Savior and "immidiately" the Savoir reaches out to him and saves him saying, "O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?" When we focus on the Savior, we can do the impossible. Despite the crashing waves and difficult circumstances around us. Jesus works through our faith and obedience to preform mighty miracles. Trust in Him! (Also-- Luke 1:37)

I love you all! Make someone's day better this week.

xoxo,

Sister Bagley

Losts of Unposted Pictures.

When You Can't Speak, LOVE.

Okay, first things first: can someone PLEASE find my long-lost friend Morgan Evans and kick her in the rear for not emailing me about her mission call!? Thanks. I'd appreciate it. But after you kick her in the rear, CONGRATULATE HER! I'm so excited! Brazil!? So cool. 

Anyways, hello again from Korea! What a crazy week it's been! I'm just going to make up a list of things to talk about and there's no real particular order or connection to the different things I'm going to bring up-- it's just a compiliation of all the occurences in my life from the past week. Ready, set, Go!

1. We got to go to the temple this week and it was suuuch a cool experience! It was just so cool to be in a place I've never actually been before and still feel as if it were familiar. All the 만수 investigators (our investigator and the Elders' two investigators) showed up at the temple when we were leaving and we got to talk to them and hang out with them a bit on the temple grounds (which was way cool!) Our investigator wanted to get a picture with us in front of the temple and while we were posing one of the other investigators asked one of the Elders (while motioning in our direction), "Why do they look so happy?" and the Elder immediately responded, "It's because they got to go to the temple! The temple is such a happy place!" Preach it!

2. We set a baptismal date for our sweet investigator! As part of my greenie training I was in charge of offering the invitation. I was way nervous about it all day but when the pivital moment actually arrived, all I felt was peace. We set a date and everything! April 6th. The only sad thing is that she's moving out of our area this week so we had to refer her to another set of Sisters. Sad to see her go but glad to see that her life is being blessed!

3. I ate pig intestine and coagulated blood this week. I've been eating all sorts of strange foods. Too many to list, honestly. But it's an adventure! I've been taking Dad's tip on not asking what I'm eating until after I've already consumed it. Every single time my trainer says, "Do you wanna know what it is?" and I say, "One sec." and stuff the food in my mouth, chew it up real well, swallow, and then say, "K, what did I just eat?" I thought I'd be more grossed out about it. It doesn't phase me anymore. And for the record-- I eat Kimchi like a champ these days.

4. Miracles this week: One day we were running way late for an appointment and I had no more money on my bus card (but I didn't know it until I'd scanned in on the bus). Normally bus drivers in Korea are kind of rude and don't really care-- but this guy was so kind and just waved me on to the bus and said it was okay. Free bus ride. Also, our timing has been SPOT on this week thanks to the help of the Lord. We've been trying to get a bunch of less-active visits done and normally less-active visits result in people yelling at you through a closed door or just blatantly ignoring you. But twice this week we walked up to doors as the people were returning home-- which allowed us to meet them and share a short message with them. One instance, in particular, was cool because we accidently took a wrong turn and ended up going on a 45 minute detour. So when we finally arrived we were just hoping that something good would come from the visit. Lo and behold, we rode the elvelator with the girl and didn't even know it was her. But when we followed her off the elevator and realized who she was we were instantly grateful for the long and tiresome detour we'd managed to take. So cool.

5. I've officially acquired a Korea mother! There are about five ward members we meet with consistently every single week and the rest are a mix and match of other members. But of the consistent ones, we've found a Korean mother. She deemed herself such this week. I love her to pieces! She feeds us and we teach her lessons every single week. And she never lets us leave without a bag of food. And the best part? We get hugs from her!!! I love hugs. Koreans don't hug. Anyways, her exact words were, "Your real mom is in America... but I am your Korean mother." I was so excited. I'd already considered her my korean mother but now it's official.

6. Turf-burn for days!! With all the soccer I've been playing, I was just WAITING to see when I'd get a huge turf burn. This was the week! I played with a TON of elders and young men this week (I was the only female on the field... this is my life) and I tore up my leg with a sweet slide tackle! It's way gross but way cool. I don't feel complete walking away from a soccer game without turfburn on my leg. 

7. I got to sketch a little bit this morning! I just started drawing an asian-looking dragon and I'm having a blast. There's a picture of it-- but it's just the preview of the final product-- I only worked on it for about half an hour so it's been a pretty quick (but way fun) project.

8. Since my comp is the sister training leader in our zone we go on a TON of exchanges. It's way fun though. This past week I went on my first exchange where I stayed in the area and my comp went to another one-- which meant I was senior companion. Yikes. I was texting people in Korean and making phone calls in Korean and navigating the bus system and freaking out the entire time. Long story short: I'm quite content with being the junior companion for now!

9. We probably walked about 10 miles yesterday. And we didn't eat dinner until 7. What a way to spend fast Sunday! haha. Man we were dying! but it was fun and it was such a beautiful day so we definitely weren't complaning.

10. We had 12-week follow up training this week which meant I got to see EVERYONE I came to Korea with! I was sooo happy! I'll always have a special place in my heart for those kids. I love them all to pieces. 

Anyways, like always, I'm happy and I'm happy to be a missionary! Sometimes I photocopy my face at the church just to make things interesting. I think that life is meant to be enjoyed and I'm definitely enjoying it. I hope you're all enjoying it back at home as well!

Sending you all my love from Korea,

xoxo,

Sister CaLea Bagley

Korea is the Coolest.

Well, another week has come and passed in the crazy cool country of Korea! (I was originally aiming for a life-changing alliteration right there.. and it kind of worked... but it ended up being slightly more anti-climatic than I'd hoped.) Anyways, people keep asking me what it's like to be a missionary in Korea... so uh, here's a short (and most-likely lathered-in-sarcasm) summary of a typical day in 만수:

6:30-- The alarm pierces the silence and I hear my companion say, "...already...??" as we roll out of bed (which isn't that hard because we sleep on the floor) scramble around in the dark looking for our tennis shoes.

7:00-- breakfast and shower time! Whooo-hoo! Fun fact about the shower in our apartment... it's merely a shower-head connected to sink. So long story short, when I shower, the entire bathroom showers with me. fun, fun!!

8:00-- personal study. It's the best.

9:00-- companion study. It's also the best.

10:00-- 12 week study. (greenie life)

11:00-- language study. Korean is hard. But not at hard as I'm working! I will conquer!

12:00-- LUNCH. We eat rice and 김 (dried seaweed with salt and oil on it.. and I'm quite obsessed with it, actually.) for...every meal. We're real exciting. (But mostly just poor.)

.... and then we go out and do work. Which usually includes: member visits, more member visits, talking to people on buses/the street/subways, trying to find a less-active member's house... and running from one appointment to the next (literally RUNNING) because there is never enough time in the day, I swear! Sometimes we even forget to schedule meals. We're the worst. But we're working hard and that's what matters. 

So anyways, I have this super huge book that I brought with me to Korea from the MTC (that probably took up about a fifth of the weight of my suitcase on the flight over here) that I've been studying to help my Korean and on the front page it has one of my FAVORITE quotes about learning a language for the mission:

"...you can learn Korean. You can speak well if you wish. The Lord has called you to do just that and He will never fail you if you are diligent in your efforts and desires. I promise you that if you will study diligently, practice tirelessly, bear ridicule and embarrassment good-naturedly, and seek the Lord constantly, you will receive the gift of the ability to speak Korean. Your understanding will open and your tongue will be loosed. It will not be easy-- no, it may be the hardest thing you ever did, but, then, the Lord does not bestow gifts easily." 

So yeah. I don't really have time to talk about how AWESOME I think that is. But I did want to go ahead and share it. Anyways...

This week has been awesome! Our work here is really starting to pay off! Opening an area is definitely not the easiest thing in the world but it IS a lot of fun. We've officially started teaching our first investigator and we have a few potential investigators that we're hoping to meet with this next week! I can't even begin how cool it is to have the opportunity to start applying all the things I have been studying so hard for the past few months. But the coolest part about teaching is the power of the spirit that comes with the message we share. It's such a powerful experience. 

We're told to use our talents in order to help us spread the gospel and this past week I got to do just that... after English class this week a bunch of men (and young men too) went out to the dirt field across the street from the church to play a match of soccer. I've been dying to get out on a soccer field for sooo long and so Sister Sloan and I managed to talk ourselves into getting to play along with everyone else! Typically they don't let girls play... but long story short, near the beginning of the game, no one would really pass the ball to me. But by the end of the game I had people passing to me like crazy and coming up to me and giving me high fives. At the end of the game they deemed me the "MVP" and at church yesterday everyone kept saying, "Wooow. You scored three goals!" and telling me that I'm going to be professional. I definitely feel the love here in Korea. Looks like I'll be playing soccer a whole lot more. (all those years of practice are paying off! It's helping me spread the gospel!) Soccer in Korea is way too fun.

Again-- I'm happy. So happy. I know I say that every week but I mean it with all my heart. There is nothing like being a missionary. And there is NOTHING like being a missionary in Korea. I have been so blessed. And it's such a cool feeling to know that we're not out here on our own. We've got the power of heaven on our side and I definitely feel the help every step of the way.

"We never need to feel that we are alone or unloved in the Lord's service because we never are. We can feel the love of God. The Savior has promised angels on our left and our right to bear us up. And He always keeps His word." -President Henry B. Eyring

Anyways, time is running out! But I love you all and I'm grateful for the prayers and love you've been sending my way. I can definitely feel it all the way over here in Korea. I'm happy to be here, I'm happy to be serving. Miracles are real, I see them in my life each and every day. 

Take some time to feel God's love this week. 

To really sit back and feel it. Life has a tendency to get busy and it's important to slow down long enough to notice all the blessings that we've been given. 

Smile at a bunch of strangers this week. 

All my love,

xoxo,

Sister Bagley

p.s. Challenge of the week: so this upcoming Sunday is fast Sunday, right? I read Alma 45:1 and thought it was a really cool scripture. From what I read I kind of understood that they not only PRAYED in gratitude towards the Lord, but fasted in gratitude as well. That being said, this upcoming Sunday I'm going to fast for all the things I'm grateful for. I thought that was such a cool thing! I'd never thought to do that before.

It's Getting Warmer in Korea!

Hey Family, Friends, loved ones, whoever you are,

What's up!? I hope everything in the real world is going well. I pray for you each and every day (missionaries pray a lot, fyi) so I hope you can feel my prayers for you wherever you may be. I'm in Korea. That thought is still way, way, way, way, WAY strange to me. Can you believe it? I'm all the way across the world eating all sorts of crazy food and trying really hard to speak this crazy (but awesome) language. It blows my mind. (p.s. I hope everyone had a happy Valentine's Day!)

I'm so happy. I can't even really find the words to explain it; it just is. Yes, this is the hardest thing I have EVER done and yes, I miss all of you so much every single day, BUT I am so unbelievably happy. I don't even really understand what I'm feeling but I am grateful for it. 

Um. I'm just going to go ahead and share little snippets of things I write every week... here's the one for this week:

Light. 

It warms my heart. With each beat of life it spreads throughout my veins until it reaches every last inch of my being. It's everywhere; infusing itself into who I am. I feel it shining out of my eyes and sparkling every time I show my teeth. I feel it tingling in my fingers and in my toes. The words coming from my mouth (which really aren't even my words at all) travel through the bitter darkness and collide with ears that are longing to hear truth. And just like that, the light sparks something in their hearts and starts to shine through their eyes as well. That's what makes us different; the light. It's so vibrant in a world that is so dark.

I am a messenger of light! He has called me forth at this time to this place to share His light, His love, and His words with all who are wandering blindly in the darkness. What a wonderful calling I have been given. I feel the light. I can feel it every single day.

So. I read Mosiah 21 this week and definitely fell in love with it. (I'll explain more later on, just keep reading.) Anyways, it talks about Limhi's people are suffering through all sorts of afflictions and how they eventually begin to just murmur because of the burdens that have been placed on their shoulders. Now, when I thought of this I thought of myself and of how I felt sorry for myself because I can't speak Korean as well as I'd like to even though I'm living in Korea-- murmuring comes when we start to think about ourselves. Anyways, because they were so focused on themselves, they decide that they wanted to take matters into their own hands and try to deliver themselves out of bondage (even though they knew very well that they were not capable of doing so on their own.) So, relying too much upon themselves, they attempt to make life better for themselves. And alas, they got whooped by the Lamanites. I can't even imagine what they must have been feeling at this point! They were afflicted and their attempt to make life better for themselves only made life worse. So, in their utter despair... they attempt again to go to battle. And again, they get demolished. Again, I can't even imagine how much their poor hearts must have been hurting at this point. And as if they hadn't tasted sorrow enough, they try AGAIN, a third time, to go to battle. Again, they were not successful. 

It isn't until this point, where they are lower than they have ever been before, that they realize how incapable they are. In verses 13 and 14 it talks about how much they had to humble themselves to realize that they NEED the Lord-- they could not ease their burdens on their own. And so they cry out in desperation and the Lord heard their prayers. He didn't take away all their problems immediately (because we have to face the consequences of our decisions in order to truly learn and grow), but He eased their burdens little by little and strengthened them that they would be strong enough to bear them. 

Now, let's relate this to my experiences this week...

We met with SO MANY members this week. Since we're opening a new area we don't exactly have a plethora of investigators to be teaching. That being said, we still wanted to have opportunities to teach in Korean. So we passed around a sign-up sheet in Relief Society for people to sign up to have us come and practice teaching lessons. This resulted in us teaching a total of 13 member lessons this week. (The elders each taught 2-- if that gives you any idea of how insanely busy we were.) In our very first lesson, we sat down to teach and despite how much I'd practiced my Korean, it felt like a total failure. The member kept correcting us to the point where we felt like we couldn't even speak. It was a really tough and humbling experience. Anyways, we walked out of there feeling super beaten down and super upset. But as we walked down the road I realized that the only reason I felt upset was because I was being a prideful little human. Immediately, I felt terrible. I was focusing way too much on my own lack of Korean-speaking-ability that I wasn't even recognizing the role that the Lord had been playing in my life. I've learned SO MUCH Korean in such a short amount of time! It's quite miraculous, really. And I could have, in no way, accomplished that on my own. So I decided right then and there that I definitely needed to remember that the Lord has called me here and has asked me to learn this language so that I can be more qualified to teach these people the gospel in their own language.

And, like the people of Limhi, once I humbled myself before the Lord and changed my "I can't do this" attitude to a "Lord, I'm going to try really really hard and I know that you'll help me to do what you need me to do" attitude, I saw miracles. 

Immediately, I was happier, more confident in speaking to complete strangers on the bus, and somehow, I was able to speak Korean. (Simply, but I was speaking! And people could understand me!) Later this week we met with another member and midway through the lesson she interrupted me as I was speaking and asked, "Wait, did you learn Korean before you were at the MTC?" and I replied, "No, I started studying Korean in the MTC." And as I continued to speak and bear my testimony on the atonement, I said, "I know that through the atonement of Jesus Christ, we can do all things." And she started crying. I was using my own experiences of learning Korean in order to talk about the power of the atonement and when I looked up, she had tears streaming down her face. I know, without a doubt in my heart, that the atonement of Jesus Christ gives us strength beyond what we can comprehend. It's not just for sins; the atonement gives us hope in times of despair, strength in times of weakness, and a goal to work towards. It changes us for the better. And I've felt it's power in my life every single day since I started looking for it. 

I love being a missionary. This work is the work of the Lord and I know that we wouldn't be able to do it were it not for His help every step of the way. I'm not capable of many things, but in the strength of the Lord, I can do all things. He's reaching out towards us always-- it's our job to take His hand in ours and hold on as tight as we can. 

Look for the miracles in your life this week!

I love you!

xoxo,

Sister Bagley

New Goal: Must Learn to Like Kimchi!

Well, I'm here! After the longest flight known to the existence of men, (3 hours from SL to Detroit and then 14 hours from Detroit to Korea) I am here and I am happy. And for the record, I lost a day of my life during the trip here. If anyone finds my February 4th, please notify me because frankly, I'm kind of worried.... jokes. Jokes. I actually got to sit next to Elder Demille on the flight and that made things exciting. I wasn't as terrified to be stuck in such a small amount of space for such an extremely long amount of time as soon as I discovered that I'd be sitting next to someone I know and love! Thank heavens for that! Anywyas, yeah. Korea. I'm not even really sure where to begin because it's been quite the adventure since the moment I stepped off the airplane into Incheon Airport.

Anyways... My mission president and his wife are the grestest people ever. So much fun and so kind! They made the transition into Korea a little smoother on our sanity. My trainer's name is Sister Sloan and she's the greatest person. She's been here in Korea for 9 months and she's from California. She's the sister training leader for our zone so that makes things fun and exciting. We have been assinged to open a new area for sisters in Incheon (I blame that on the fact that the first thing I told the mission president was that I love trying new things... ha.) called 만수 (pronounced monsoo) so we're starting from scratch in the area and that's been pretty tough. But we have 16 appointments scheduled this week along with ward members and our ward mission leader was pretty impressed with that. Wish us luck as we work to get things burning here in our new area!

Um, I don't have much time this week to write (I'm so sorry!!) but there are a bunch of random, fun facts about Korea that I thought you might enjoy hearing:

 1) there are pingpong tables in every chapel. Like. Multiple pingpong tables. It's great.

2) There are virtually no traffic rules around here. Red lights are merely a suggestion. And all the cops are teenagers. (Quick sidenote, if someone who is older than you tells you to do something here, you HAVE to. No questions asked. So, you can see how teenagers being cops could be a problem. "Don't give me a ticket, officer" -says the eighty year old psychotic driver "Okay........I'm sorry I'm an idiot." -says the poor, young cop trying to do his job.) So, long story short, I always feel as if I'm going to get hit by a car. It's the greatest.

3) Old people LOVE American missionaries. Seriously, everywhere we go people are either muttering "beautiful! beautiful!" under their breath or screaming it at us from down the street. Needless to say, You're gonna have to tell me that I'm beautiful a bunch to make up for all the Koreans here that tell me I'm beautiful. hahaha I honestly probably hear it at LEAST 300 times (or more) a day. They call my companion and I "twins!!" but only because we're just white girls. You know how all asians look the same to white people? All white people look the same to asians.

4) They serve kimchi at every meal. (Fermenting, rotting cabbage with spices on it.) I'd rather eat my own foot. But instead I get to choke down kimchi because it's polite!! Pray for me to like kimchi.

5) The fruit here makes up for the kimchi. Like, hello fruit of the heavens. It's served as desert here-- no joke. I crave it all the time. I love fruit so much.

6) They have all sorts of "exercise equipment" on the streets for pepole to use. But it's practially the equivalent of a playground for old people. And they don't even really work-- for example, one of them is literally a big wheel (like that on a toy ship) and you just sit there and spin it. SO FUNNY. My companion and I love watching the elderly people work out on them because everyone takes it so seriously and it doesn't even really work anyone out. It's real great.

7) There's no such thing as garbage cans here. The only place I've seen one is in a bathroom or in our aparment. We have one garbage. And we have to sort all of our garbage. There's food garbage, plastic garbage, paper garbage... so different. Needless to say, my purse is full of garbage that I couldn't put anywhere else.

8) They heat their apartments by heating the floor. SO WARM. Whenever I'm home I just lay on the floor because it's soooo warm. Our beds are on the floor too. So when we wake up we're always dying of heat. But it's fine. We don't have a functional dresser yet and we don't have hangers yet either so all my clothes are in my suitcases on the floor and they feel like I just pulled them out of the dryer when I put them on because the floor heats them. I'm a fan of that. Except... real dryers don't exist here. Only hang drying. So fun!

9) They have THE cutest kid's clothing stores EVERYWHERE and so now I want my own babies. So bad. I literally have to refrain from purchasing baby clothes on a regular basis.

 I had to speak in church this Sunday and that was the most nerve-wracking experience of my life. I just sat on the stand looking out into a congregation of people who all speak Korean and thought to myself, "I can't speak Korean. What on earth am I supposed to do right now!?" I may or may not have had a slight panic attack. But it was so reassuring to have so many people come up to me afterwards and tell me that they thought I was an older missionary and that they thought I'd been out for as long as my companion. Three missionaries (me included) spoke yesterday so I was pretty unexcited to be compared to the other two speakers. And I had to speak last. But I was glad to sit down after I'd spoken knowing that I didn't have to speak anymore. What a relief.

Ummm. I had a dream about all my loved ones this week and it made me feel super heavy. I just missed everyone so much and felt so overwhelmed by the fact that I am in korea and away from everyone. Immidiately, I sat down at my desk and just started writing away. This was the result:

"Memories of them dance upon closed eyelids as my mind takes me on adventures I've yet to see.

My heart feels heavy when I rise from my desire to have them near.
But I press on.
I wear my best smile and I press on.
This is the Lord's work and because of Him,

they CAN be mine."

I'm thankful for the knowledge that families can be together forever! Being a missionary is not easy-- but I've never been happier.

This is HARD work. But the task of the Lord was never meant to be easy. I'm grateful that He believes in me enough to challenge me.

You're in my thoughts and prayers! Korea is great. I'm adjusting well-- slowly, but well.

Love you!

All the best from Korea,

xoxo,

Sister Bagley

One Week Left!

Well. Things are getting pretty serious here at the MTC. Our "native" missionaries (the group of native Korean missionaries that are going to be serving in Korea with us and who will leave the MTC with us in a week and a half) arrived this week! We're all still kind of stunned about that-- like, what? Our natives are here? That means we're going to Korea way sooner than we feel ready. But at the same time, it's about time we get out of here. We've been at the MTC since the dawn of time. It's time for us to just go and struggle and learn. But we're still freaking out about it.

We got our Korean name tags this week too! We all sprinted around from classroom to classroom reading everyone's tags and taking pictures. For the next sixteen months I'm going to be known as " 배글리 자매" (which sounds like this: bay-kuh-lee cha-may), or in other words, Sister Bagley in Korean. I can't even wait. It's just weird that the final touches of our MTC preparations are finally occurring. I've watched this happen twice already and it's hard to believe that this time it's for us-- WE ARE GOING TO KOREA!!!!! (Everyone is invited to freak out with me.)

Oh! In other news, I'm no longer the sister training leader. So that's been an adjustment. I was so grateful for the opportunity to serve, but I'm not going to lie, it's been pretty nice having so much extra study time. I think it was just what I needed for my last few weeks here at the MTC. 

We hosted all the new missionaries this week and guess what: I FOUND JORDAN CRUMP! I didn't host her but Sister Anderson (the adorable blonde sister who takes ugly pictures with me on a daily basis) did! I ended up running into them a little later and we made a scene because I dropped the suitcases I was lugging around and sprinted up to her screaming before I leapt into her arms. It was a pretty exciting moment, obviously.

Hosting was super cool though! I mean, watching the looks on the faces of the mothers as I led their child away from them for an eighteen month time period was probably the worst moment of my life (and it happened about seven times...) but aside from that, it was great. Our district will host again next week because it's our last week at the MTC. I'm actually really looking forward to that. Even though it rips my heart out kind of.

So in Preach My Gospel, on page 133, there's a super cool quote about learning languages and I think it's by President Thomas S. Monson. (If I had my PMG with me right now I'd just straight up quote it right here... but since I don't, I'll just tell you where to find the quote I want to quote right here... sowwy.) Anyways, it hit me: learning Korean is hard, yes. Very hard. But it is such a gift. And beyond that, struggling to learn Korean is a gift. God is obviously capable of all things-- so if He wanted to, He could give me the ability to speak Korean right here and right now. He could do that at any moment. BUT, He hasn't. It's been a slow and gradual process and it's going to continue to be a slow and gradual process. The gift of tongues is a gift that God promises His missionaries through diligence and hard work. But the struggle has to be part of acquiring that gift. When we struggle to learn Korean, not only will the ability to speak Korean be a gift, but we acquire gifts such as patience, diligence, love, and long-suffering in the process. So, because God loves us, He allows us to struggle in the language-learning process so that He can bless us with more than one spiritual gift once all has been said and done. I thought that was pretty cool.

I'm so grateful for the opportunity to be a missionary. I am so grateful for the opportunity to be stretched beyond my limits. I am so grateful for the opportunity to become the kind of missionary that my Heavenly Father wants me to be. That's something that hit me this week pretty hard. I can't be the missionary that I want to be. I just can't. But I CAN be the missionary that God wants me to be. And in the end, He has far greater plans for me than I have for myself. So, my goal this week was to simply strive to understand what kind of a missionary God wants me to be. 

I let that thought bounce around inside my head for a few days. And after it lingered in there long enough, I realized that the first step towards becoming the missionary He wants me to be is to just love. I can't speak Korean (okay, I can... a little), I've got a terrible sense of direction, I'm a baby-- I'm only nineteen years old and I'm going to Korea, but despite all the things that I can't do, I CAN love. And so that's what He's sending me to Korea to do. I may not be able to say much in Korean, but I can love. And what more does a missionary need than love? I think love can conquer all things-- even language barriers. And Jesus Christ is the ultimate example of love. I wear His name upon my chest. I can't do a lot of things, but I can love. And I want to invite others to come unto the Savior in order to feel His love. 

Being a missionary is the coolest experience. I'd try and explain what it's like but words don't do it justice. This is one of those things that you just can't even begin to understand until you embark on your own missionary adventure with that black nametag upon your chest and an army of angels and prayers pushing you along. This is the Lord's work. And the whom the Lord calls, He qualifies. 

Wish me luck in my last week here at the Provo MTC!

Korea better be ready for what's coming-- here comes district 28B!

xoxo,

Sister Bagley

Ready or not, here we go! (See ya, 'murica)

So, with this being my final week at the MTC and whatnot, I've had a whole bunch of people asking me all sorts of questions. All of which, however, fell in line with this one general question: "What's the biggest lesson you've learned from your experience here at the MTC?" 

Well, the MTC is a place of much learning, that's for sure. In the last two months of my life, I have learned countless lessons that all contributed to one big lesson: at times, I cannot; but at ALL times, the Lord can. Before I embarked on this grand adventure, I picked Alma 26:12 to be the theme of my mission. (Okay, go ahead and read that scripture before reading the rest of this.) I had no idea how much that scripture could really mean to me until I arrived here. It's impossible to learn as much as we have learned in the short (yet somehow seemingly-endless) two months we've been here; yet, we did it. I was blown away every single day by the progress that was made both spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally. And this is just the beginning. There has not been a single day that I have spent here where I have not felt completely inadequate. That being said, there has not been a single day that I have spent here where I have gone to bed without a smile. This is by far the hardest thing I have ever done-- but that's what makes it the greatest thing I have ever done. I'm a mere mortal who is susceptible to failures, mistakes, and shortcomings. Yet I am the daughter of a God who loves me enough to lift me up out of my own imperfection. Not a day has gone by where He hasn't helped me to be greater than I could ever be on my own. And that's what I have learned. I am not really that great. But the Lord is. And because He loves me, through His love, I can become great. This is the Lord's work, if we tried to do it on our own, we would surely fail. But I know that He is with us, holding our hands every step of the way. We may stumble but He will not allow us to fall.

I was standing in line in the cafeteria a few days ago when one of the elders from the younger dongi ended up in line behind me. He looked a bit troubled. So, I turned around and asked, "Hey, are you doing alright today, Elder?" He just furrowed his brow and looked at me for a moment before replying, "Yeah. I'm just feeling contemplative today." I raised my eyebrows back at him, which caused him to continue by merely inquiring, "Now that you're at the end of your journey here at the MTC, looking back, is there anything that you regret?" 

Without even hesitating, I responded, "No. I don't believe in regrets." And I don't. I don't regret any experience I've had here at the MTC because I have done the best that I can and because every experience, whether it was good or bad, was a learning experience. Everything happens for a reason, the test is how you choose to respond to the circumstances that come your way. Yeah, there were tough days, yes, there were days when I felt extremely useless, but those were the days in which I learned valuable lessons that helped me to understand how to be better later. So no, I don't have any regrets. I have only hope-- each new day is a new opportunity to be better!

On the first page of my journal, I created a list of goals that I have for my mission. It wasn't a list that I just sat down and wrote all at once-- it was a list that I continually added to as I've been here at the MTC. I don't really know why I'm sharing this right now, but I feel as if it could help someone. And if anything, it will help me to be accountable for my goals. 

1. I will always be the "best" companion I can be because every missionary deserves to have a good companion.

2. I will never let a frown conquer a smile.

3. I will always remember that, at times, I cannot; but at all times, the Lord can. It's HIS name that I wear upon upon my heart.

4. I will conquer every negative thought that creeps into my mind with positive thinking. After all, it's impossible to think more than one thing at once. 

5. I will be the arms that hug, the hands that help, and the ears that listen for my Savior. I will help His children because so many of His children have helped me.

6. I will be fearless, faithful, and fierce.

7. I will strive towards being fluent in the language of the spirit; I will see Korean as a tool rather than a barrier. 

8. I will remember why I chose to be a missionary in the first place; especially when challenges cause me to stumble along the way.

9. I will do everything I can do to always speak Korean.

10. Exact obedience; if sticky situations arise, I will immediately remove myself from them.

I'm going to be stepping off the plane in Korea in just a matter of days. I suppose you could say that at this point in time, I am left with a decision to make: I can choose to either walk in fear or to walk in faith. In 2 Nephi 9:46, it talks about how fear causes us to shrink. In comparison, faith helps us to grow. When we walk in fear, we are living below our potential. Heavenly Father has great and wonderful things in store for each and every one of us and He promises to help us become great but we must first learn to trust in Him. The greatest things in life require us to take a leap of faith; when we look upwards and trust in the Lord enough to jump and reach for things that may seem far out of reach, He will give us the wings that will carry us far higher than we have ever before been. No set of difficult circumstances seems quite so difficult when you've got the power of the heavens giving flight to your wings of faith.

I'm taking that jump.

And I know that the Savior won't let me fall. 

Each of us has a leap of faith that we can take in our lives...

My challenge to all of you this week is to just jump. Faith works miracles.

He won't let you fall, I promise. 

사랑으로 (with love),

배글리 자매

(Sister Bagley)